Thursday 6 November 2014

Novelty Fat Bird Rant

Today i have a complaint ...dont worry its not contagious . Ive been trying to find a winter coat in the Charity Shops , please bear in mind ive been searching all summer and things are getting desperate . I was reduced to looking on line which was even more depressing £75+ for anything , now i know they have to use twice as much fabric to make fat bird clothing but i do think they take the p***.
Im out in all weathers so i thought try some of the outdoor shops , Go Outdoors dont do anything over a size 16 , so if your fat you dont go outside or take any exercise? the assistant said most people just wear the mens ones . they were an awe inspiring collection of drab browns and blues plus im afraid i dont have the arms of an orangutang but the build is pretty similar . I guess im just not a conventional size .
Now i havent got fat with kids and age , i was a fat child who grew up into a fat adult and i can remember being the only fat child in the school , now that novelty has gone the whole world has got fat , so why are you limited to a couple of shops on the high street that make you think that a burka is a good option . Theres a lot of hideously expensive choice on line , but im afraid my budget doesnt run to a few statement pieces . Vintage and Retro in large sizes is virtually unknown in the depths of lincolnshire .
Im not about to get skinny as an act of defiance , my idea is for the pall bearers to give them self hernias or they may need to get a forklift into the crematorium .

Now im even more irate , i put fat bird into google images to steal a pic and what do i get hoards of fat budgies !!! Are fat birds that disgusting that weve been bleedin censored by google!!!!

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