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Wednesday, 15 August 2018

Bringing Out The Best

Well the boys grandad decided hospital lunch wasnt for him and after breakfast and a natter popped his clogs quite quietly at the weekend . Middle son says its because he didnt want to hang around for the birth of the antichrist!!  Theres never been any love lost between him and Young Baldrick .  Mr Bah Humbug is quite upset, after all his ex father in law had been a mate for 25 years and he still used to go and sit with him up till a couple of weeks ago.  Middle son is quiet but I think he knows that it was for the best , hes still at grandads fending off various family members who could barely wait for the announcement before they were round shouting...MINE
There is a large family who all hate each other and it looks as if its going to be the whole familiar saga of greed and guilt. Grandad was a very Marmite figure , he didnt care for me and i was pretty ambivalent about him . The boys will attend the funeral , we are keeping our distance, the squabbling and fallouts will doubtless continue for weeks and unless it affects the boys we are not getting involved
On a completely different note . Im so glad the weather has cooled , ive cranked up the slow cooker cauldron of doom and im testing winter menu dishes , best discovery ,the cucumber glut that the munchkin grew can be incorporated into curry , sausage casserole and bolognese without anyone noticing . we have a mental amount of plums but they are gorgeous and dont hang around for long . Year of the wasps is upon us so picking fruit can be interesting . I need to pick the tons of windfalls from the apples , im hoping the rain swells them as they are tiny this year . Pears, its an average year small but plenty .
So life is currently remaining quiet and not very exciting , which is a good thing

Sunday, 12 August 2018

Well I Never

Im having a bit of a flabbergasted week  trying to get my head around a family event announcement that came out of the blue .  It would seem that Young Baldrick is breeding !!!  No one sounded more shellshocked than his partner as she announced this over the phone , it would seem that she assumed it was the menopause , being somewhat older than him plus already a mother of three that are growing up fast .  So the event is due around Xmas . Her health not being not great and with Young Baldricks genetic problems , they will have to see how it goes im afraid . It stands a much better chance of not having problems if its a girl . It will merely carry the defective gene he has. His partners problems are not genetic merely bad luck in life . So im not starting knitting  just yet , but being a pair of Goths I may get to knit goth baby clothes and embroider bats!!!
Then the boys poorly Grandad ended up in hospital with a chest infection , he is dying as he tells you ,but hes been dying for well over two years now and keeps hanging on to the edge of the hole as the dirt crumbles around him , hes out of intensive care and on to a ward now so once again he may make it home for our middle son to look after , if stubbornness can keep you alive hes got a while yet . As his son commented its not time to ring the Coop yet !!

Tuesday, 7 August 2018

Party Political Old Biddy Broadcast

So lets talk politics , now I have to say this in public , im from the north , im a benefit scrouger . see that wasnt hard was it ?
So therefore I feel its my duty to comment on the current state of the Labour Party , WTF!!!  Party ? you useless bunch of tossers are like a gang of kids in the final week of the school holidays , ripping into each other over trivialities , unable to unify.

 Put aside your differences and stand together that is the strong point of the Party , not this endless infighting , the press is mincing you on all sides . Jeremy old love just tell them all to shut up , stop wasting your time and voice on anti semitism . Get on your soapbox and tell the world we are not discussing this matter at the present time we have more pressing problems at home . Most people grasp there is no right or wrong on that argument , The Israeli lobby will stll be going on about the Holocaust for the next millennia as an excuse for any atrocity they care to commit , The Palestinian lobby learn hatred at their mothers teats , they will be butchering each other till the end of time . Sort your own Party out chuck .
You Jeremy are electable in an old fossil kind of way , your Blairite pack of backstabbers however are not, anything tainted by the Blair label needs to go  , preferably before the return of Mrs May from her humiliating jollys round Europe tour .

Brexit..ho hum so Mrs May is grovelling her way around Europe in the guise of being on holiday , we must all tremble at the thought of a no deal Brexit . Horror stories in the press everyday , you do get the feeling that she realises that she has a hopeless bunch of incompetents as ministers and that they will be crying in the closets of their offices come the day , meanwhile there's pensioners building up huge food stocks rather like preparing for the Millenium Bug to strike , or the next Armageddon date .  I would think the most you need is to make sure your up to date with any regular medication , buy a few tins of milk powder and just ignore the panic .

 Unless you live in a city that is , where if they run out of Energy Drinks the riots will begin , theres nothing like looting a TV shop to help with hunger pangs is there ? Didnt Boris buy a few water cannons ?

Tuesday, 31 July 2018

Well That Was Fun

The annual pilgrimage to a field near Leicester is done for another year , camping was not fun . so hot you could barely breath, then tropical monsoon season , now  I have a wet tent to try and dry, plus mosquito bites that are nasty and all over , anti histamines and ibuprofen seem to be working .
 Mr didnt move much and spent the time nattering to mates sat on his throne , even he said its getting to much for him , the ground had cracked badly due to the heat so he darent go out on his crutches, even the loo trips were deadly .
Did come back to find id won a lot at the local auction that i hadnt viewed , I now have someone elses material stash to add to my own..lol...havent had the chance to go through it yet just a quick look at the vintage knitting patterns id spotted in the sale photo . My daughter however had a mental moment and bid on the wool stash , shes just discovered crochet and being stuck at home on sick for another week at least ,thought this was a good idea , she now has a huge mountain of weird and wonderful wool , she also purchased another dressing table , just because it was cheap , I can currently hear all the banging about upstairs as she tries to sort that out . There was also a huge bag full of wool scraps and knotted together wool that will be my TV watching hobby of an evening for a while , she would have just chucked this but im finding it quite satisfying proving the point that theres a use for everything..lol ...pompoms wool for the munchkin , fibre art etc etc
So thats my boring uneventful life ...but after the fun we have had in the last year uneventful is good

Thursday, 26 July 2018

Ho Hum

I think im rather neglecting the blog at the minute , but its the heat and endless chores eating up my life plus lets not forget the granny duties . You know the six weeks of trying to stop munchkin and Grandad from killing each other . Ive been fortunate in a weird way , daughter is off sick after her boob job , so shes been able to keep him entertained . But thats part of the problem he expects to be entertained every waking hour . What has happened to kids in this generation they seem to be totally unable to amuse themselves , hes banned from all electronica because nothing he watches is in the slightest bit educational and he can run rings round me when it comes to blocking the endless trash he would otherwise view . When did kids TV become such dross , apart from horrible histories which im addicted to , at least he doesnt want to watch endless Heartbeat like last year so theres some plus points ..lol ..
At nine years old our summers were the great outdoors and that was it for 6 weeks , thats the principle my gran worked on with me and my boy cousins there were 6 of us most days , we were fed huge slices of jam and toast in the morning and we were out of the door for the day by 8am . We had a tumble down ramshackle farm to amuse ourselves with , chasing rats out of the stacks , with an old petrol scooter to trog round the lanes on , plus build ramps from anything we could find , dens , fires to roast our hedgerow dinner on , half cooked spuds and fruit from the hedgerows , tomatoes filched from someones greenhouse . On health and safety grounds alone we should all have been dead..lol

We have a glorious summer and you barely see a child out playing, Vitamin D makes them grow , in theory 4 inches during the school holidays for boys , I know houses dont have gardens anymore but in a bid to get them out there maybe we should have turn off the router week ?

Monday, 16 July 2018

Fun Packed Weekend

So we toddled off at 6am on Saturday to the big car boot at Stickney near Boston  , Mr took his spazzie buggy and trundled round remarkably well it was huge and the paths are made from crushed shells so no boulders or big holes , they also had a disabled toilet which is unusual for a car boot and the parking was right by the gate . Do wear shoes rather than sandals the crushed shell gets everywhere . So yes i would recommend this one for the differently abled so long as your battery is fully charged..lol ..Going early in this heat is a must and before the crowds if your in a chariot is always a good idea we left at 10 and the place was heaving  .
Did we buy lots of stunning treasures?  err nope , I bought a carrier bag of wool and a load of fruit and veg which we shared with grandad, new potatoes with everything this week , i must have stopped to look at hundreds of things but nothing said take me home . Mr bought loads of current buns for the freezer and some weird engineering bits as he does. Must have walked miles, Mr came home in a state every tiny bump ramps his pain up so it was snoring with industrial drugs afternoon .
Then yesterday it was fishing with BIL , crabby grandad and the Munchkin because his had surgery last week mother, had gone to see Eminem with her mate , the tickets cost so much she would have gone on a stretcher methinks .
Without the Munchkin its great fishing, i get a bit of cross stitch and a good book to read between fish , i have to land them all , set up all his equipment etc , Mr cant manage that part anymore on a plus point it can be a long time between fish he only managed 6 all day yesterday , and  i was introducing a family of voles to Watermelon rind , looking for wildflowers and stopping Mr and Munchkin from killing each other , so 12 hours on a lake side was hard work.
  Industrial drugs again for MR last night now hes snoring on the sofa,  so a quiet day with lots of chores and hopefully a siesta....if im lucky, the munchkin breaks up for summer on Friday so then ive six weeks of trying to keep him and grandad occupied and amused without them killing each other , I was looking at a bottle of Gin in the coop last night and wishing i was rich...lol
 

Wednesday, 11 July 2018

Autism Paranoid Rant

I tend to think a little outside the box because i was raised by those who were on the spectrum before it was even viewed as existing,. plus ive raised those on the spectrum as well. I come from a family where autism runs rife , its such a huge spread of a diagnosis that i think all of us have some of the traits , but only those of us who are a problem in some way, usually with schools, end up stuck with the label .
 I have an Aunt in her 60s who has spent most of her life in care , back in the day she was merely viewed as retarded as a toddler, put into a special school then graduated to a Mental Asylum . She was pregnant in her teens , had no idea of how it had happened and her perfectly normal son was taken and raised by another aunt.  She now lives in a sheltered housing scheme  and spends her days happily playing internet bingo for hours , visited by my generation and her son . The older generation , my mothers, have simply ignored her existence for most of her life . You put people like that "away" as my mother says , she also had another Cousin much the same who also had the same life pattern , put away as a child to be forgotten about .  My mother arranged for my Aunt to be sterilized after the birth of her son , thats how things were done back in the 60s .
Lets fast forward to now the enlightened age, so called , once again im noticing some rather odd happenings , the rather high incidence of children being labelled with different Autistic Spectrum disorders in schools . My grandson has been signposted as autistic at numerous points in his school career , usually when a teacher cant cope with him , hes a damned handful, far older than his nine years, think street smart teenager with a gob .  He grasps concepts far beyond the other kids , has an interest in making money and politics and does not conform , hes very much an individual . Having raised his mother and her brother , plus inherited Mr Bah Humbugs genetically disordered pair , i dont bat an eyelid . Theyre great adults who think outside the box.
 Young Baldrick attended the same junior school , he was a violent aggressive nightmare there , he will have problems all his life , but hes doing sort of ok at the moment .
But the big problem we have is that after 2 years of a wonderful young teacher , who loves my grandson to bits , accepts his odd,etc etc . Well next year he has the old witch from hell as his teacher she taught Young Baldrick back in the day and was assaulted by him on a couple of occasions . when he was in nursery she made my grandsons life a living hell , she insisted that he should be statemented on numerous occasions, we refused, the situation just got worse and worse. Till he went up a year and suddenly he was fine with a different teacher .
There is no other school , the headmaster is to put it nicely a bit of a spineless nobody . He loathes me and the fact that i know far more about the autistic spectrum than he does , for an uneducated guess my grandsons problem is GAD  Global Anxiety Disorder , put under pressure he panics then you get a full on meltdown . Other than that hes educationally far beyond his peers, when he finds an interest in something hes obsessive , he excels at all things sport . But I admit he can be a handful if hes bored.
The teacher he is going up to has the older generation attitude to Autism , they should all be stuffed in a special school , not cluttering up her classroom of normal children. My grandson should have the official label stuck on him then so she doesnt have to bother making any effort . Next year at school is going to be fun but not for my grandson .
Discuss ................

Wednesday, 4 July 2018

Heatwave

So im sat inside looking at the sun again till after tea ...lol ...then activity start till midnight , just got to weed burn the veg beds once the sun has moved to the front garden ,plus clean out a shed, on a plus note no grass to mow as its all dried up and died ...Question why arent weeds killed by the drought ?
I popped a few cheapy melon plants in that i got from the car boot sale for 20p , they are loving the heat and look quite promising , the sweetcorn is going mental and it almost looks like a garden , this is the munchkins food growing project this year he has beans and marrows as well , ive just been concentrating on garden destruction , no fixed plans just a trail of destruction based on what i can scrounge from skips and local fly tipping This afternoon its going to be process stuff for the freezer , daughter keeps buying fruit and veg but its that hot nobody is eating much , ive celery and carrots that will make stew packs for the winter . we did demolish loads of honey roast parsnips cold the other day they were 5p a bag in the Coop so i couldnt turn them down really , quiche for tea made from fridge leftovers , ive a sad pineapple that may be roasted as well , curry coleslaw and a rice variant of some description. Ive also started putting a few bread bags of mash variants into the freezer everybody's buying new potatoes at the moment so theyre cropping up under yellow label a lot . Just useful for a quick shepherds pie when i cant be bothered .
This weekend its the 1940s weekend at Woodhall Spa , it brings in thousands of tourists so we wont be going very far , its strange its the stuff nearest to you that you never visit isnt it . Mr suggested we should go, but the parking is £10 which isnt that bad and theres tons of stuff to see and do but  its miles away from where he wants to be, theres a shuttle bus but he wouldnt be able to get on or off  with ease . I wanted to go and visit an archeological dig in Lincoln that has an Open Day on Saturday so we might go their instead


Monday, 2 July 2018

Ode to the Builders

Well the builders have been fun , they turned up on the right day at the right time and were baffled by what they had to do . Their worksheet consisted of one line . Fit replacement boiler .
There was no stock list so they had no idea we were an oil property , we waited for the delivery of parts to find out out what they were actually doing , it did turn up eventually and consisted of the same boiler just a newer one and a single radiator . By this time id rung the council and played hell up , the builders were ringing their office up playing hell up and chaos raineth !!
Bless him the lad said I can only fit what has been ordered so started ripping the old boiler out , the folks from the council turned up that afternoon by which time i was seething , id spent 2 days moving everything for them to need nothing moving !! I might as well talk to a pair of planks , it would seem their was a communication error between the council and the builders , we had to have the boiler delivered because the part form hadnt been filled in correctly. So what was the point in fitting a new boiler the same as the old one ? more waffle im afraid so it took them just a day and a half in total and im still trying to put stuff away , theyre also coming next week to fit a new oil tank and im not moving the shed !! they can walk round to the cow field at the back with it stuff them!!

Monday, 25 June 2018

5am start

Well ive been up an hour and i can vouch for the fact that at 5am it was glorious here on the edge of the fen , now the fog is so thick that i cant even see across the garden ...lol
Mr is snoring on the sofa he hasnt slept much having decided to start a major project in the garden , a huge complex radio mast that isnt going well and must be finished before the builders start Thursday and  more work on it today, I could cheerfully put a pillow over his head , my back is screaming from having to help him yesterday and it had just nicely settled down again to the point where i walked the school run yesterday for the first time in weeks .
 Theres the big tent to be put up today for him to move into for the builders visit , im rather hoping hes eaten by Bambi or visited by a herd of rabid hedgehogs in the middle of the night . but then again hes informed me i must have a walkie talkie with me at all times, day and night so he can call for assistance. Bleedin men!!!  All this because he has to take his pride and joy custom built Vespa out of the dining room for the duration , its not insured because the insurance lapsed during the DWP wars and he now cant afford to reinsure it  because they have trebled the premium , i have suggested chaining it to his commode or his ankle , theres a wee bit of an atmosphere to say the least .
Ive spent every penny i had on an online grocery shop because i simply cant fit a trip out into this weeks equation.
 This is where i turn into the evil grouch from hell due to lack of sleep and back pain  , Mr Siestas through the day keeps me up all night and im running round like a headless chicken trying to move everything for the builders , then nursy duties Thursday onwards with daughter after her op, the builders here , the munchkin to sort and garden duties . Heatwave , sarcastic son being even stranger than usual , case worker visits ....it goes on and on 

A Life , A Life , My Kingdom for A Life

Friday, 22 June 2018

The Curse of the Builders

A very Agatha Christie title today methinks...
Anyway the gist of my rant  is that the builders are starting next Thursday , not bad since it was November when they were going to do the urgent boiler replacement. The man from the contractors turned up the other day to assess the job . It would seem its all going to be completely different to what the council told us they were doing . they are now not putting the boiler outside, its going back in the dining room , they are also replacing all the radiators , taking out the cylinder from the airing cupboard , not replacing any of the pipework and it all has to be done in two days...really
Confidence was not inspired by the fact that the bloke they sent stank of beer and appeared to be still pissed from watching England the night before , he turned up an hour late then fell asleep in his van outside !!
He also pointed out that theyre replacing the oil tank outside , and that we may be expected to move a shed to give tham access!! but that will be next month thank god , not sure how im going to manage that at all .
The inevitable moaning about our jammed stop tap that they wont replace because its joined to a lead house supply and its in the middle of the kitchen not on an outside wall , we are tenants this isnt our problem, contact the council they are well aware, im not wasting my breath anymore !!
So chaos raineth , Mr Bah Humbug has a lip on because ive told him he must remove the Vespa from the dining room . He has announced he is moving out into the large tent in the garden because he cant cope with the hassle , floorboards up etc and hes taking his scooter and his porta potty ...men
ive got to move furniture with a nine year old munchkin as my assistant , because everybody is either ill or not here at the moment , daughter is having surgery on the day they start so i cant even be there for her ...aaargggggggghhhh

Monday, 18 June 2018

Going Home Runrig

The road trip to Manchester was a resounding success,, ive never cried so much , my eyes are still sore . Runrig has been the Story of my Life ,  through a crap marriage , singledom and then MR Bah Humbug and his trials and tribulations there has always been Runrig.  We have grown old together and them hanging up their guitars has dragged that thought into the forefront of my mind . There was even a fan in an urn occupying a seat .  The Munchkin loved it once it was up and running and he and another little girl got to shake hands and be fussed by the band , there were a great many generational families there , a lot of stereotypical mad drunk jocks and many a tear was shed .


So this was the best xmas present ever, if the saddest , I wish i could have managed the final night at Stirling but at least my daughter and her partner will be there .


Im on such a morbid drag over this that yesterday I pointed out to Mr Bah Humbug that Penny Cat and little Doris will probably be the last kittens we ever own , his comment ?

Well youd best hurry up and snuff it ,then they can burn you in a pyre at Stirling on the final night !!!

Saturday, 16 June 2018

Runrig Bound

So today im being dragged to Manchester to see Runrig for the final time , its been a long journey down the years , they have announced their retirement and this is the final tour , so im dragging  my sorry lame arse along with daughter and grandson to the Bridgewater hall . The munchkin has been in a state all week about it , despite seeing more live bands than your normal nine year old , hes in a tiz because its Manchester and people get blown up there . I have pointed out that im still here despite people getting blown up in Manchester since I was a kid .


My Daughter is going to the final concert up in Scotland later in the summer but I knew i would struggle with that, as at the moment im struggling to sit ..lol ...today will be interesting to say the least but i will manage , lots of will power will get you most places then i can snot and cry with the other old biddies at the end of an era

Tuesday, 12 June 2018

Timed Out

AARRGGGHHH  when do i get the time to blog ? Life has sadly been rather full on the last couple of weeks . Mr BH had a minor foot op last week , trivial but very painful and now the bruising is starting to come out hes in a bit of a state , so grumpy has no meaning , we are all trying to avoid him.
 Idiot GP doubled the tablets that are doing me no good theyre still doing no good as i told him theyve never worked in the past why would they now?  theyve left me very dizzy and spaced out , so when i get an appointment hes going to be told where to shove them .
 Ive now been asking him to send me up to see the kidney bloke for 6 months , my back pain is getting to the level of cant move.
Idiot GP proudly announced that they had received my medical notes transcribed from the secret vault they are kept in by the government. It consisted of 93 94 and 95 the only years they could find !
He now admits that i have had various surgeries that if he could be arsed to examine me can be plainly seen in the motheaten carcass i live in . Im fairly sure i have a kidney stone ive had them before ,that needs lazering, well i hope thats what it is . If not god knows.

Then my ex father in law 92 who went into full time care with Alzheimers  earlier in the year, was told to clear his 3 bedroom council property out in 7 days , despite the rent being paid and up to date . So my daughter got lumbered with that job, because she had a van and nobody else could be arsed among his 3 sons and numerous grandchildren , they  just told the Council to bin it all and send them the bill.  She rescued all his personal stuff photos and paperwork , delivered stuff to various charities , gave stuff to his neighbours who helped her once she told them the situation etc etc .
Harold was a lovely bloke , he would do anything for anyone and cared for his partner Mary for over 20 years , he went down hill very quickly after a couple of falls and just gave up . He knows nobody when they visit him , Alzheimers is so cruel, so we grieve for him twice its just his shell sat in the old folks home he has left the building

Friday, 25 May 2018

Pussy Power Lincoln

So thats me showing up on all the weirdos internet searches this morning !!
Today their are 2 cat Jumble sales in Lincoln , Dunholme cat protection 1.00 advertised on lincs fm events page and Lincoln Cat Care at Washingborough 12.00 very little advertising, without a Tardis very little chance of making it across Lincoln to them both due to traffic  ..lol...might give it a go if i dont budget out at the first
Last Sunday I had a whole £4 in my purse and toddled off with the munchkin to the car boot at Metheringham , if i can get a vehicle out this is my preferred relaxation , but at the moment theres always some snoring zombie parked behind me . I do like to go really early to avoid heat and crowds , plus i can get back by 9 to sort Mr Bah Humbug out for the day .
Did I buy loads ? nope it was garden canes , some different beans to those the mice army ate and a few herbs that havent overwintered and of course a couple of books..lol  Broke my heart there was a 70s Sindy with other Sindy bits and bobs in a bright red little suitcase £4 the woman asked was she charging to much ? Nope im just skint as usual.
This brings me to odd thought on Poverty , its all over the press and internet how hard times are , millions living in povety etc etc . But isnt poverty something you perceive yourself to be in . In my Darkside job I often had to fill in statements of income for various court purposes with people , it was a real eye opener. There were those who couldnt understand that £200 a month on self care , gyms hairdressers beauticians etc isnt a necessity . That kids after school clubs costing £100s a month arent a necessity, car leasing £500 a month etc etc they consider themselves poor .
But the other end of the scale are those who exist on a pension or other government pittance and make a go of it , they dont consider themselves poor, just grateful to have something coming in .  The label Scroungers is stuck to them , but its a lot more time consuming and stressful than people imagine its not sitting there covered in tattoos , smoking fags and sitting outside the pub on a sunny afternoon , its endless errors , lies and downright cruelty from this incompetent shower of shit ruling us . We are being run by an incompetent school debating society , who dont even do their own shopping ....rant over

Sunday, 20 May 2018

Going To The Chapel

https://www.letsknit.co.uk/free-knitting-patterns/knit-prince-harry-and-meghan  Had to pop this link in didnt I . 

Image result for prince harry swim suit
 Got to be the best of the wedding souvenirs .
I spent the wedding sat on the side of a fishing pit with Mr Bah Humbug and his brother The Ginger Gnome , snored through most of the day im afraid , then came home to view the wedding highlights .
Ive come to the conclusions that Amal Clooney is a succubus , nobody should be able to look that good and George is starting to look more tiny and wasted every day as if she sucks the life from him . There was some seriously stunning fashion on show most of it really tasteful . Victoria Beckham looked like she was going to a funeral , i do hope the Pizza delivery was for her , I know shes tiny but theres limits.
The bride looked stunning and the Firms bling was very impressive , she was born for that tiara .
 Just like a proper chav wedding there were endless family problems , you do wonder who got hammered at the reception and threw up in the pot plants. 
For those of us who dont really get Royalty the highlight had to be The Windsors Royal Wedding Special , chuckled my way through that one, watch this if you get the chance its on catch up TV somewhere , the Tramp Catcher was a gem and proved to be very true .
I do think Meghan is the brains in this relationship , brilliant move inviting so many of his exes.  Harry always comes across as nice but worthy, he will be the Labrador of husbands , baffled but adoring , so long as she can convince him that his decisions are his own they should have a long and happy marriage. 

Wednesday, 16 May 2018

Sun Is Shining

You know when you start a job then it leads to endless other jobs ?  Well i went down the garden and started tidying , nothing got done at the backend of last year due to Mr Bah Humbugs health and the DWP . 2 Bonfires later i had the thought we dont need as much veg this year , so lets remodel the garden !!  So despite a really late spring and the swamp being hard going ive started . Theres also the fact that Mr BH can no longer get this far from the house to criticise everything i get up to . Still have no funds for this project so its all got to be scrounged or picked up from local fly tipping on the airfield , the local resource for all manner of useful things . This is eating all my spare time in fact ive only managed a single Jumble sale and a visit to Torksey car boot . Mr BH doesnt go into Jumble Sales even the ones with tea and cakes his walking being pretty dire these days .

Torksey hasnt changed in the two years since my last visit , still tons of stuff and Mr BH can get round half of it on his buggy the other half would need an off road buggy its all up and down and potholes , so he sat and people watched while i spent a whole £1.50 on a gorgeous green vinyl 70s suitcase covered in world travel labels and a couple of plants . He still hates his buggy with a vengeance , he says its just embarrassing and people stare , but it is the only way he can get around.

But despite Mr BH being a grumpy mardy wee cripple , I wouldnt be without him . Sues sad news brings that home , Col will be sadly missed a really useful male and an epic maker of bookcases  with a cheeky grin right up to the end . 

Wednesday, 9 May 2018

A Mumsy Tale

I psyched myself up last night to phone my mother , Mr Bah Humbugs comment was , "Soul Eating Time !!"
Bless her she was positively chirpy .

 I had an electrical problem . I blew up my kettle!!!
Then none of my sockets worked and the fuse box is under the airing cupboard and if i get under there i cant get out .
The gist is she had blown the trip and the idiots who she had in to replace her boiler had moved the consumer unit from out of the airing cupboard into a tiny empty cupboard beneath just to make it more convenient for an 83 year old.

Have you got Darren to come round and sort it for you ?  my cousin lives a couple of streets away

No hes on holiday , so I asked Mark, he managed to pop in between jobs .

Now my Cousin Mark lives in the same town , hes an undertaker and between jobs meant he came and parked his black private ambulance on the drive , while he flipped her trip, had a cuppa and tried to escape from her  My mother lives in a quiet little close packed with other pensioners . 
The next morning she got up to find a pair of cards on the mat, opened them and they were condolences on her own death...lol
Being my mother she had gone stomping round to the two old dears involved, had a go, and given them the cards back . The jungle drums being good in a small town she had gone shopping  ,got on the bus and it all went quiet .
We then had a whole rant about the fact she only had two cards on the mat and people staring at her  ....Mothers!!



Tuesday, 8 May 2018

Weird

This week has been a tad strange , the orthopedics firm that the local authority puts in place has been replaced with a new one , so we were summoned for a triage meeting with a new consultant for Mr Bah Humbug , so we toddled off to see this newbie .  He was very Eastern European , good English seems to know his stuff , but i dont think hes worked in the NHS much . The outcome is hes stopping Mr BH referral to Hull which it has taken 2 years to get , mainly because its not worth treating him due to his other health problems mainly the heart problems that they cant find a cause for ,  hes also asking for a referral to have MR BH gastric banded , which was the point where MR BH started to look a wee bit baffled , hes also sure that at least 2 more discs , have gone at the top of Mr BHs spine but he will just have more and more go anyway so when do you stop replacing them ?  He also questioned why MR BH uses crutches .
When we managed to get in a word edgeways and pointed out he has problems at the bottom of his spine as well that cause neuropathy and bowel and waterworks problems , he looked at the scans went AARRGG..... then  he beamed at us and said gastric band will not cure him but it will make him easier to move for me when hes bedridden . The look on the nurses face was a picture . We came out looked at each other and just cracked up laughing ......but its not really funny at all .
I think the consultant has spent to much time in the private sector that he thinks a NHS gastric band is just asked for and given , i seem to remember it takes 2 years of counselling and at least 5 stone weight loss before your even considered for the list, thats without the fact that MR BH is inoperable due to his unexplained heart problems  , plus he will be just as disabled after having one as he is now . But easier for me to care for , ive a feeling the new consultant is going to rattle an awful lot of cages , but i quite liked him .
Its also sent MR BH into one of his really dark mental holes yet again, hes going to be referred to Pain Clinic  to try and numb him to his future methinks, theyre always a nice helpful bunch so we have to settle for that for now .