50 Seconds of Fame

Yesterday I had a busy day , the last few gale forced days stuck in the house prompted Mr Bah Humbug to say we were going to Stickney car boot , so we toddled off to a freezing field in the middle of nowhere yet again , it was bitter so Mr decided to go in shorts and a tee shirt then spent the next 2 hours looking like a smurf mounted on his scooter , following us about commenting on how bracing it was , refusing one of my jumpers  which i hasten to add wasnt pink or floral and generally behaving like a pain . There was stil loads of stuff there but not a single thing i wanted , just veg lots of veg .
For the grand sum of £4.30  , I got a huge carrier bag of beetroot an even bigger bag of sweet potatoes of the wonky veg type , celery,  bag of 4 green cauliflowers, a huge savoy cabbage , bag of scrubbed carrots i couldnt carry it all , so i was grateful for middle son coming along for the ride . Then i managed to get a whole winters worth of huge fresh garlic cloves for £2 from a Polish gentleman i had a chat with , it seems his parents have a small farm and he does the trip once a month in his little white van, taking medicines and electrical goods out to them and loadening up with fruit and veg in season coming back , he said he thought this would be his last trip due to Brexit . Who knows .
Then I came home to a neighbour laden up with a car full of Bramleys his whole crop had come off in the gale , so he was doing the rounds of the village giving them away , he took a load of pears in exchange , the gales dont seem to have bothered mine at all .  He was eying up my rose hips and i told him to just take what he wanted and ask round if anyone has a use for hops, mine have gone mental this year and i dont need them this year .
And my 50 seconds of fame you may ask , it was The bowls club jumble sale yesterday at Washingborough , stood in the scrum at the jumble . A lovely lady and a horrified partner , he said it was all the fault of that bloody blogger she reads who goes to all the jumbles round Lincoln and says what bargains can be bought ...lol...Did I get any bargains ? a book , 3 articles of clothing and the biggest ball of Arran Wool ive ever seen,  spent £1.20 , im just such a spendthrift . Notice for another jumble was on the wall.  6th Oct 1.pm at Potterhamworth Booths Village Hall , do check this as their are often last minute changes .

Men

Now many of you know that Mr BH is a tad handicapped due to spinal problems , their interesting side effects plus a heart that skips and jumps . Which is why hes known as the families pet cripple .
Last month the van miserably failed its MOT at the local garage , it needed a lot of welding , not just a bit . Now the man who has the garage is a mate , he hates welding so avoids it whenever he can , we had one of those natters as we do .
"Cant the old man do it , hes a far better welder than me"
Bare in mind hes not seen MR BH in person for a couple of years . I go home and Mr  Bah Humbug picks up his crutches and demands to be driven up to the garage . He hobbles in on his crutches , grabs a pew and they sit and bitch for ages . We come home and he says "im thinking about it "
Next day the deliveries start arriving , we already had all the welding gear gathering dust , it was all lumps of metal and tins of gunk .
By the end of the week he tells me to bring the van home and announces the boys are starting welding school whether they like it or not !!
Worryingly when i went to pick it up , his mate at the garage says . So hes figured out where to get a sex gym from???!!
I should have been suspicious when a huge engine hoist appeared from grandads , but i decided to just go out and stay out .
On coming home they have the rear of the van five feet off the ground achieved with a tilt lift and the engine hoist, and numerous scaffolding poles . Mr Bah humbug is lashing strapped on a pile of sofa cushions on a crawler board and they are wheeling him around as needed . He has his dwarf brother underneath grinding away and the boys stood there like a pair of lemons looking horrified .
Sarcastic son informs me that plan A had been to dangle Mr Bah Humbug from the engine hoist so he could do the welding , the crawler board is plan B but Mr BH had to take some serious industrial pain relief after Plan A had failed miserably he then  told them not to ring an ambulance whatever happened . The pain relief was so effective that he kept falling over so thats when Plan B had been hatched .
Mr Bah Humbug spent the rest of the weekend drugged unconscious !!! totally unable to walk .
The neighbours have spent the last couple of weeks looking in horror at the flying van on the drive , we have had people knock on the door to ask how hed achieved it , dog walkers standing shaking their heads etc etc . Mr BH has achieved village legend status but he says its simply an engineering formula involving counterweights ....MEN ......to be continued

Unending Saga

When will the trail of caseworkers ever end in our lives..lol ..Nice son has got his very own caseworker to help him with housing needs , it would seem he may well be housed by the council , much to our surprise. I did think it would be a case of finding a private rental for him , so was working on funding that somehow .  Because his homelessness will be caused by  bereavement  and he has got a formal notice to quit from the solicitors he would be fast tracked into the same hostel that Young Baldrick  was in .  Because he has no problems with drink or drugs it would just be for a few weeks to assess him for independent living , which he wouldnt have any problems with , he does need a bit of help with form filling etc as he has a slight learning difficulty which is why he gets a caseworker . It does mean that i somehow have to accomodate all his furniture and goods into storage here until he gets somewhere to live . What fun that will be...lol ..His scooters and car are arriving today , he has a car but he cant drive yet, Grandad became very poorly just at the point he started his driving lessons.
Otherwise Harvest Chores are eating huge chunks of time , apples though small are in their hundreds , not good keepers they are being eaten and apple sauced in the slowcooker daily the mountain of pears next on the list  , still hunting for that cheap large upright freezer with my name on it at the auctions , the van being off the road for a few more weeks is hampering my plans .  My car that had been off the road since i finished work has gone to live with Uncle Kevin till it dies , it started first go after nine months on the drive !! and that has left a gap for sons car.
 Im frantically trying to get rid of stuff to make room for sons stuff , biggest annoyance was that i filled the cars boot with loads of toys and books then could find no charity shop that would take them , apparently they dont take many toys on health and safety grounds , they wont take action man because it promotes war ,but they will willingly take slutty Bratz dolls that promote what? ...go figure . Only unused sealed toys are welcome . six shops later , the local hospice took them .

I found a file with dozens of my knitting patterns !!

The Return

So im back , from the depths of gloom and bafflement , non the wiser, but life is busy taking its weird turns yet again . Yesterday was the first normal , take me to the jumble sales i need some stress relief day and i had company . Middle son , now relieved of grandad duties has shown an interest in getting out and about and he likes finding all manner of strange gaming and electronica for pennies . The main problem is that hes a big lad and can carry almost anything , think Ginger Desperate Dan , they share a build and a cow pie wouldnt phase him in the slightest . I feel like a dwarf at the side of him . the plus side of this is that i can buy big stuff and he just carries it effortlessly ..lol
Real world problems are surfacing yet again , son needs to find somewhere to live , hes still at grandads at the moment , he has the option to stay as long as he wants but even he admits he cant afford the running costs of a big four bedroom detached, even if he gets a job straight away.  We dont have the room but daughter is applying for mortgages and looking at houses so longer term he could be coming here , but hes not that keen,  hed like a bit of independence, hes 24 and gave up all the usual teen and youngster stuff to look after grandad and grandma who had Alzheimer's.
I did scare him and Mr Bah Humbug to death yesterday , all i suggested was if he couldnt get a job he could look after his dad and i could go back to work , the looks of horror on both their faces was well worth it ..lol 

taken when he was a teenager , posted just to embarrass him..lol