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Friday, 15 August 2014

Budget Fat Bird Fashion

Lets talk about fashion . I know fat and fashion dont belong in the same sentence girls and all you skinny minnies are getting the smug pass the cream cake gloating look out of the box . Anyway lets be honest in the depths of Lincolnshire fashion is totally meaningless , so long as theres a pocket for the tractor keys and your footwear can cope with the local super product mud, then be happy .
If your a big girl in Lincoln then your choices are limited we have Evans now lurking in a corner of BHS bleeding expensive and very sparkly bird on a cruise , though the footwear and underwear are quite good quality . Then theirs Yours the fat bird equivalent of Primark , much cheaper but every other fat bird in the county will be wearing the same thing.
So now lets travel to reality for the rest of us , supermarkets do up to a size 22 in some lines , this should give you the basics in black of course but it will fall to pieces fairly quickly and go out of fashion in a couple of weeks , plus they only ever stock a couple in the larger sizes and 20 of every skinny minny sizes .
So heres a guide to fat bird fashion for the skint and deranged among us .

1, Buy anything you find on the £1 rail in the charity shops in your size ...notable exceptions , polo shirts ,
manky faded teeshirts and pre stretched leggings .

2 . Go home and look in horror at what you have bought , try it on . Many things you wouldnt believe would look good when hanging on a bad plastic hanger in the charity shop surprise you when viewed actually on you .

3 Then theres the items that make you think OMG I look like my mother , put those to one side

4 Theres the , this is my punishment for being fat items , put those to one side

5 Peculiar sized items , you know they still have tags so you bought them , but they were made by someone in a sweat shop in Bangledesh with a sense of humour . put those to one side .

Now heres the fun part , make sure you have a really good pair of scissors and proceed to hack things about , you are only wasting a £1 if it goes wrong and it can always become dusters or patchwork. For the none crafty Do Not Panic spend a couple of weeks viewing this blog

Come on being fat doesnt mean you cant be an individual , have a bit of budget fun

daily mail version of fat birds .....yeah right 

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