Saturday 11 July 2020

Plague 47

Where to begin , our cuckoo in the nest is driving me steadily mad , so if i vanish for a while dont worry , there is a possibility i may have murdered him but its more likely i will be having a bit of an episode and just want nothing to do with the world at all . Im not getting much sleep with him here as hes up wandering about half the bloody night . When i do get nodding off hes shouting and swearing at his Xbox till the early hours . I actually spent several hours sat in the fishing shelter drying in the garden just to get away from him . He smells like a ferret , doesnt wash just glares at me if i say anything, i even begrudge cleaning the endless skid marks from the loo after him he just treats me like a member of the staff , its got to be bad if even his dad has had enough him .  He has grown in to a truly horrible vile adult .  Aspergers can be the weirder offshoot of the autism spectrum and quite often it leads to paranoid schizophrenia as an adult and i do think there are real signs of this . Nothing  is his fault about the horrible mess he has got himself into or so he thinks and believe me its his attitude to authority that has ended up with him stuck here yet again . People have been trying to help him but he doesnt see it that way , now there is an 18 month old child in the mix he is finding he cant just do what he wants and cut off all the help that is offered . Ive always liked his partner shes rather like me in the keep plodding on whatever is slung her way mentality but this is going to boil down to whether social services decide hes a danger to the kids in which case we may be stuck with him for good . The fact he may well be a danger to us counts for nothing it seems . He is an adult and we cant force him to accept the help or medication he is offered , plus it will be expected that he lives here full time because the munchkins bedroom is empty regardless of what we say, thats the sad fact of state housing these days and the bedroom tax.  So wish me look ...my life once again has entered the realms of you couldnt make it up 

15 comments:

  1. If he's an adult you're not compelled to have him living with you. You've obviously no love for him so instead of complaining on here get in touch with Social Services for him to be rehomed.

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    1. The lad's her partners son. Kate has every right to complain on here. It's her blog.

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  2. Jeez Kate. I feel for you pet. You are definitely stuck between a rock and a hard place on this one

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  3. Don't put up with physical abuse though-if he ever becomes violent you will call the police for yours and his sake x

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  4. Kate - I put up with a paranoid schizophrenic for 20 years before I gave up and got out - now at the age of 65 I bitterly regret those wasted years on him, his affliction and his sense of self first and foremost - we only walk this way once - is this lad worth your precious years of life to keep putting up with him and trying to sort his mistakes out again and again - you've done it so many times before - you will only have this one life, don't waste it on someone who hasn't the decency to speak and treat you with respect - Youre worth better then that - Good Luck xxx

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  5. its your house so your rules. You are not responsible for him. You are allowing this behaviour, total disrespect to you . No way would clean up a man's skid marks, let them disrupt sleep. Mr BH needs to be singing from the same hymn sheet, setting boundaries.

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  6. I know its tough and he is "family" however, I think you have gone above and beyond already and I second what Trudie says. I think it's time to be a bit "selfish" - you already have enough on your plate and no matter what you do it will never be enough. It is sad and I feel sorry for him but at some point self-preservation should take precedence.
    And above all - don't be driven out of your home and don't let him treat you like a servant. If he doesn't like your rules - including taking a shower on a regular basis - then it's time to call his bluff and chuck him out.

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  7. My goodness, life is not easy for you. Take care.

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  8. Turn the internet off when you go to bed.

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  9. I feel for you I too have a difficult adult in my life and have put up with a great deal but your life is worth something too i would take away the xbox at night and insist in him showering especiaally in a pandemic

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    1. "take away the Xbox at night" This isn't a 6 year old she's dealing with, it's an adult.

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    2. i only suggested that because the poor lady cant sleep if she cant sleep how is she to cope he is an adult but behaving like a child

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  10. Trudie has the best advice. Have some self respect and get him out, regardless of whose relation he is. I'm wondering how much respect your partner has for you in letting you deal with that.

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