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Tuesday, 28 February 2017

Lets Be Positive

Im trying...honest
At the moment i get the feeling that either Donald Trump will decide to invade or I will find an Alien in the airing cupboard!!
Its as if life is an ever depressing soap episode..lol ..one big surreal fantasy .
Last week Mr Bah Humbug tried to book a Doctors appointment 6 weeks post his winter lurgy and snot fest he was coughing and in agony . We got the evil receptionist , who told him to go away and ring back on Monday , which we promptly did .
  We actually got an appointment at the next village surgery rather than the little bungalow in the woods that operates as the mother ship for the practice , we drove up there . It was deserted which was strange just us and one other bloke and a big notice stating theyre shutting all the branch surgeries from this week and you will have to use the mother ship in future , on reading the notice it seems theyre closing them because its to dangerous for a doctor to operate on their own out in the wilderness, who knew its so dangerous out here in bandit country? and they cant fund then anymore We have transport but theres an awful lot of pensioners and the rural poor who dont have anymore . Our bus services are virtually negligable
But to our amazement we actually saw the real practice doctor , not one of the nutty locums or the odd young lad who just taps it in the puter and looks at the answers,  my other half always calls him Dr Google , she actually examined Mr Bah Humbug something none of them have done in the last 2 years it seems he has at least 3 cracked ribs .
Him and the boys have gone off for mission xray today , hes also got to have his pelvis xrayed because he may have broken something in there !!!  She pointed out this is really odd, we know his spine has broken from time to time but this is the sort of injury you get in your 80s so he will have to have some tests done for osteoporosis . It looks as if he has done this just from coughing he says hes not tumbled badly since last year , but he wouldnt admit it if he had . Theres no treatment it should take around 14 weeks to heal, if it heals, we just have to be careful he doesnt get pneumonia till then.
We had quite a long chat with the Doctor as there were no more patients , discussed his re application for ESA which she is more than willing to do the paperwork for .  She said the same thing weve said its allright saying hes fit for work but hes not fit for work unless proper support is provided and its not his fault that the types of things he can do are few and far between , plus the broken bones mean hes not fit at all for the next three months at least . I did point out he had his wrist in plaster during his last ESA medical and they said he was 100% fit , plus they had managed to make him see through an eye that has been blind since he was a child .
So this is todays episode of you couldnt make it up...lol
Dont you think I could write soap scripts with this carry on ?

Sunday, 26 February 2017

Dinosaur

Today I am mostly feeling like a dinosaur ...lol
One of my strange miserable old biddy gripes has to be Lincolnshire Coop , out in the villages beyond Lincoln they are often the only shop for miles , so they have a captive audience really , in the last year they have all undergone or are undergoing a bit of a makeover . They always babble on about being ethical and giving there members the dividend etc etc . They have obviously decided to give up trying to give their customers  a chance of living on a budget , they have become a shop for middle class ready meal eaters and those who can afford to pay through the nose for posh branded items . The quality of what they stock is wonderful but its now so expensive that shopping there is a joke if your on a limited income .  They always used to have a decent stock of basic own brand items which were dearer than other supermarkets but were quite adequate if you added in the cost of travelling  , these are now few and far between, if not you get the gap in the shelves thats always empty for days. You do a good £5.00 family meal deal not much use to pensioners unless they portion it out and eat a bit each day . Plus like a lot of families £5 for a meal is a bleedin luxury I cant afford Today I popped in for bread and bumped into my old neighbour in his 80s wandering round looking lost . As he said they dont stock normal food anymore do they ? He just wanted his basics he cant shop online, hes to frail to travel far , the bus journey to Lincoln wouldnt take him near a supermarket , they are all out of town monoliths .
Yes Lincolnshire Coop , these are your grassroots customers who have supported you for years , it may look pretty in your shop but he doesnt need a hugely expanded wine section , Costa , endless ready meals and a huge cheese selection , yes you have the things he needs but his budget hasnt gone up , just because your prices have rocketed to pay for your revamp.
Oh and while im ranting , have we got blizzards forecast ? Why have you never got cheap bread , just those god awful £1.00 bread buns ?

Friday, 24 February 2017

Feeling Windy

Well yesterday was a bit of a stinker weather wise and guess who had to work..lol it was interesting driving around playing wheelie bin dodgems and crushing recycling tubs , lots of trees down and lorries on their sides in the depths of Lincolnshire , its so flat here that we do seem to get it bad .
So what did i go and do , i managed to fall flat on my face as a gust grabbed me , i was mud from head to toe and im very black and blue and i ache in places ive never ached before , the worse of it was they then decided to cancel my work on health and safety grounds due to the weather ..AAARRRRGGGGHHH
I hobbled home to be greeted by Mr Bah Humbug at his best .
Look on the brightside ! if you were dead I'd be busy chucking your parasitic kids out . You dont know what pain is !!
 His only concern was I'd pinched his coat and it had mud all over it !!!
So I'm sat here feeling very sorry for myself , with the cat offering counselling should be at work ,but Im struggling to bend my knees , i had to take the munchkin to school  in the car this morning the one morning he wanted to walk ..lol then couldnt bend my legs for ages to get out of the car when i got home . I think its a work from home day ...sod it
This is when I really miss having a bath to soak in ..lol
2 Jumble sales in Lincoln tomorrow one at the MS centre and Reepham methodist church , ive 7p in the bank so theres not much chance of me being able to hobble there ..lol

Wednesday, 22 February 2017

Moan & Winge

Oh to have something positive to post...lol ..Ive been working on the theory of if youve got nothing nice to say , say nothing . So I'm very quiet on the blog front .
Work is an unending nightmare , had a row with my boss last week along the lines of
 no im not doing a 100 mile round trip to do a job youre going to pay me £3.00 for sunshine
!!!
But it has the potential to earn you £12

Dont make me laugh ,it will take most of the day and £3 will not cover the fuel .

Your contracted to do this .

As i'm on a zero hours contract , I think you will find that im not .

We can soon find someone else to do it .

Good, find them .

So i'm expecting the sack yet again ..lol

The reason im very militant at the moment  is that my car died , the brakes went going down a big hill into Lincoln , so I then had to do a days work using only the handbrake which was interesting to say the least .
Only to get the whole are you sodding crazy rant , why didnt you ring breakdown !!
Well we havent had breakdown cover for over a year , if i walk out on a days work ,
I have to pay for it and thats well over £500 so what do you suggest sunshine?
Anyway the sons and Mr Bah Humbug in supervisory position on his plastic lawn chair replaced the brakes , then we realised it needed an MOT .
It was booked in and failed miserably with jobs the boys couldnt tackle , so were now totally broke and its a fortnight till pay day , i have my roadworthy vehicle back but no money for fuel to even go to work .
We had our first meeting with our caseworker on Monday , once again we have to round up all the medical reports to try and get some kind of  improvement in our circumstances , we have explained that our doctors are stunningly awful and this could take weeks, but they will provide legal advice and take the whole shitty shambles to an appeal tribunal , she read the huge file i already have and cant quite believe what has happened to Mr Bah Humbug . As she says all they see is his fat belly and they have competely disregarded his life threatening spinal impingement  so we will see where this goes

Tuesday, 14 February 2017

How To Spot The Poor

Heres a few thoughts from the last few days . How to spot the poor for Daily Mail readers .
Lets start with tattoos , they will have loads because the government gives them far to much money and they have lots of time to get them due to the fact that we no longer have Workhouses .
They will be fat , due to the endless takeaways, because theyre too lazy to cook .
They have the latest phone and umpteen other electronica about their person , they should have them confiscated and be fitted with tags so they can be accounted for at all times because theyre all on the fiddle .
As you may have guessed by now , my mother has incorporated all these rants into her latest conversation ...lol
So heres todays challenge , how can you really spot the poor ?
Heres some starters
They will have a crap minimum wage job , maybe two jobs and they will have zero hour contracts so that the economy can flourish !!
 They will hang their washing out all year round in all weathers
They may spend the mornings sat in Weatherspoons or some such chain pub , because its warm, theres free wifi and you can get free refills . Its surprising how you come to love heat once your poor.
 Buggy 'Pushers hogging the shops , for the same reason,its bloody freezing at home and you can kill an hour in Primark where its like the tropics and the store detective gets some exercise following you
Buggy Pushers hanging round each others houses , because you only need to heat one house , and they go to whoever has electric that day , for heat and cooking .
So lets have some more suggestions for how to spot the poor